Daylight Day 18: How to make a cloning machine

“Bell! Bell!” said Pi.

I said, “What?”

“You were right! Mum has a natural immunity.”

“Fantastic.”

“I know. We have to clone her!”

“Pardon?”

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FYI – if you live in Canberra, you’ll be able to hear me on the radio today at 8:30am on Artsound (92.7FM or 90.3 in Tuggeranong).

How to make a cloning machine:

Parts: Duct tape (silver works best)

Two broken slinkies

A plastic fish

Two digital watches

A wig made from real hair

Two AA batteries (or, for better results, one gerbil)

Cardboard box (big enough for two adults)

Large red button

Instructions:

1. Tape all ingredients together with the red button on the outside.

2. Push button to operate.

5 thoughts on “Daylight Day 18: How to make a cloning machine

  1. Actually, science of this kind CAN be quite straightforward – such as with Serial Cloning:

    HOW TO CREATE AN ARMY OF GENETICALLY-ENGINEERED SUPER-SOLDIER CLONES IN 5 SIMPLE STEPS.

    You Will Need –

    1. A Genetically-Engineered Super-Soldier in Morula form (Morula – an early-stage embryo, in this case consisting of 16 or less Totipotent Stemcells)

    2. Saltwater Solution.

    3. An Incubator.

    4. An Army of Female Acolytes.

    METHOD:

    Step 1: Place the Morula in the saltwater Solution and leave until it has broken up into its 16 component cells.

    Step 2: Leave individual Cells in Incubator until each has re-developed into Morula form.

    Step 3. Repeat Steps 1-2 with each Morula created until you have the desired number of Embryos (though remember to freeze a couple so that you can create more later if necessary)

    Step 4: Implant Embryos in Acolytes.

    Step 5: Dominate World.

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